Unti555tled.mxd #79

8:08a i made a late night decision on friday to hunt around on zillow for a place to live. i was not expecting anyone to get back to me at all. saturday morning i got a call back to look at a condo. went by there with a really amazing agent and i love the condos we looked at. i really want to live in that complex. it was super quiet and next to the creek.

11:44a busy day. i had to give the “this is what a legal description is” talk to a taxpayer. at least it was over email. i hate it when an individual wants to come in and have a lesson i’m not qualified to teach.

3:04p ep 61 of mbmbam. they’re talking about the matrix. my only take away is that i’m still bitter that the matrix was greenlit instead of neuromancer.

3:17p jfc im going in on a deeeeeeeep dive into the county records. april 1890. the handwriting is so legible.

3:30p travis’ song is pretty decent

3:31p i had to dive deeper. there was one from 1860 that was totally 100% illegible, the scan was bad. another one from 1870 had no metes and bounds that described the street that’s on my damned map. there’s no centerline assigned to it with a situs range, so i can only assume it was proposed at one point and never paved. the subdivision was never developed, so far as i can tell. it’s out in BFE, or at least as close to BFE that one can get in my county now. we’re getting close to capacity. that’s a bad thing. the next flood? we’re all boned. all of us. i’m so scared that the high grounds that i know won’t be high ground anymore.

what’s that phrase about praying the creek don’t rise? i think it’s just that. that’s in my prayers every damn night.

side note: i wish this dude that originally bought all this land would spell his name consistenly. but idk this was well over a century ago and there’s nothing i can do about it now.

4:44p i found the dedication for the street. had a mind-numbingly embarassing phone call with the power provider out there. dreading emailing 911 about it. idk what will happen. it’s not paved, idk if the city even knows it exists. don’t know who to contact there. they will probably refer me back to my own goddman office.

just so there’s no worry: it is completely undeveloped. 100% no one lives there, there’s no danger. this is going to end up being one of those thoughts i return to when im trying to sleep and feel that unending shame and baseless anxiety.

4:47p mbmbam 62 – turning misery into a fetish is painful. like it made my bones hurt to think about. just like every time i’ve seen the film, my bones hurt at the thought of being hobbled.

4:50p sweet jesus i want to go to sleep

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