Unti555tled.mxd #87

9:06a i made a huge mistake looking for homeowners insurance. jfc i’ve had like 8 phone calls already today from agencies ive never fucking heard of trying to get my business. i just want to get through to geico. jfc.

10:39a i think i found my company. they include appliances and HVAC in the policy. hhhnnggg

11:53a anxiety is the only thing i’m feeling. it’s awful. and i know that people are busy and can’t get back to me immediately and i’m really battling this feeling of being ignored and it hurts. it hurts so much. i know it’s illogical and self-centered, but then i think, what if they actually are ignoring me? what if i’m so goddamned annoying they’re going to delay my closing because i’m tooooooooooooooo vocal and annoying and “hey fuck you millenial scum!”

2:40p the sucking vacuum in my chest hasn’t stopped yet. i’m trying not to cry at work. ppl have got back to me but omg i have more questions and i’m fucking scared.

2:43p nvm agent said she had to bust out her viper hiss on the sellers and i think i love her even more

3:39p omg off book just nailed how i feel right now, just minus the birds and bees part. episode 25, pump the breaks. the first song.

i find myself leaning on off book’s back catalog when i’m stressing and it’s so nice.

3:44p i’m really conflicted about telling some of my friends about buying a place. one of the group basically just got priced out of the apartment she’s had with her roommate for like 6 years. they don’t make enough together to meet the income requirement the new owners of their complex enforced. that is terrifying.

3:50p holy god this episode of off book will take the sting out of anything. i mean, okay, that’s conditional on a lot of things because the episode seems to revolve around a single dad giving his kids the sex talk.

Unti555tled.mxd #86

9:11a nosleep, season 5 episode 11: “phdsd – a case study”. this is a fantastic story and equally as fantastic narration from peter lewis.

it’s been a busy week so far. stressing about the condo. haven’t heard back from my agent since we talked. i hope everything is okay.

9:51a we had a fire drill. those are always fun. the noise scares the shit out of me and literally all i can hear is the alarm and all i see is the fucking strobe light. but that’s the point, right?

i think for a moment it wasn’t a drill. a nearby transformer blew up yesterday and ignited a mineral oil tank. i think the transformer is in or near the chemical plant campus. i got a message from this town’s emergency management office this morning that the fire reignited.

10:03a waiting on arcgis 10.6 to install. maybe this will help my fucking lag problems.

11:02a lag problems are still a thing. ugh.

11:16a rolling back/forward to 10.5.1. 10.6 needs a patch like yesterday.

2:21p 10.5.1 works so much better than 10.4.1 and 10.6. guess i’ll stay here for a while. my loan officer typoed my fucking loan documents. i hope she fixes that soon.

2:28p this condo must have been a rental. the seller’s billing address is different on the county’s cad versus what appears on the county’s tax office website. that’s why it has some issues.

4:53p i think it will be okay.

Unti555tled.mxd #85

9:58a got my building inspection back and it looks … okay? like every older construction it’s got some issues. i think we can hammer this out. oh i hope so. i’m waiting on my agent to call me.

i ripped my temperature shawl out again last night. i still hate it. the one i restarted would have got to be entirely too big to manage. i did figure out a formula that will calculate out what color yarn i need for the temperature in my spreadsheet so that makes my life a little easier. i’m charting out a new one that should be manageable.

11:04a i’ve tried everything i know to try and fix this fucking terrible lag in my parcel fabric. this shit is actually hurting me. it’s like, dont even try to fix a parcel just draw a new one. uuuuggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

11:43a everything is going to be okay. that knot in your gut is unfounded right now. everything is going to be okay soon.

1:30p talked to my agent. some stuff to fix, for sure. nothing that’s the end of the world though. the attic entry is nightmare fuel though, it doesn’t have a fucking lock on it and it’s a communal access. i’m excited again. this is going to work out. just go get a deadbolt and maybe something to rig a club to the ceiling to keep the attic hatch shut

3:30p today has been a very bad arcmap day. it’s crashed fucking 8 billion times today.

4:46P omg no. no no no no no. the power keeps bliping out and this last time my fucking monitor turned off my blood pressure cant handle this shit

4:49p fucking great, the internet shit out right in the middle of trying to finish this dude’s fucking cut out. god dammit. this blows.

Unti555tled.mxd #84

8:02a my boyfriend brought home a plague from his job. i thought i had just maced myself cleaning with dust and cleaning supplies. i don’t have a fever but jfc the sneezing never ends. the body aches are real. my nose alternates between gummed up and running. at least my throat doesn’t hurt anymore.

i’m only here because i’m not going to break my goddamned streak and i don’t interact with anyone. my social interaction is via phone and email. and podcasts.

this week’s hello from the magic tavern almost killed me, just like this cold. just in a way more enjoyable fashion.

8:36a day something or other with cloth pads. today’s going to be a better test, heavy day.

9:43a “a seaside british pub” is interesting so far. i don’t think i’ve listened to the season this came from yet, but it is definitely an interesting story.

12:07p that nosleep story was pretty darn good.

2:00P i feel so off my game. just in general. i’m in my mental pillow fort, asleep.

like i sat here way too long thinking one of my coworkers had made a mistake.

legal reads:

“the east 218.2 ft of the west 456.2 ft of [xyz] lot in [abc] survey”

the lot is 683.4 and was originally split into 2 smaller parcels, the westernmost being 218.2 ft and the remainder being the eastern 456.2 ft parcel.

i was staring at it thinking, why didn’t they cut the eastern portion of the 456.2 ft that the owner was selling? wtf? the sheet my coworker cut shows they’re cutting the western portion of the 456.2 parcel.

the legal states we’re starting from the western edge of lot [xyz], not the goddamn western border of what the seller owns. so what my coworker put on the sheet was correct. it took me tooooooooo long to figure that out. duhhh.

2:39p jesus why god is this happening

ok there’s 2 lots in this subdivision im doing some minor edits on, 1A and 2A.

i THOUGHT the account numbers would have a “1” and a “2” in the lot portion that corresponded to the annotation.

they’re fucking inversed

1A has a “2” in the lot portion and 2A has a “1” in the lot portion

i want to cry because i can’t fix it without throwing the entire universe into chaos

3:43p i have a huge fucking problem with the entire concept of this “together against the weather”
website i came across. because: we can’t be against the weather. we can only prepare for it. the phrase indicates that there is something to be against. like can we all just grab our guns, march down to the seawall, and fire at the incoming hurricane?

we can be against humman-accellerated climate change that is influencing the strength of hurricanes.

4:43P not too not familiaaaaaaar

Unti555tled.mxd #83

10:08a our offer was accepted and i paid my earnest money last night. countdown to the 13th is on. after that, my 60-day notice to my apartment goes in and then we can move.

i’ve been brainstorming bathroom floors since the smaller bathroom has a good deal of cracked tile. if that’s the only big thing that i have to worry about i will be so happy. now i’m just waiting on my agent to get back to me about the building inspector & their bill. omg this is exciting.

i want to do an epoxy pour floor but idk how practical that would be for a bathroom. i’ve only seen people do it on countertops.

12:23p i’m just trying not to stress out. i want to knit but i’m throwing myself at work work work work work work work work

1:40p i’m just kind of tired of the constant commentary on my dietary restrictions. like one of my coworkers will always offer something i’ve told her a thousand times i can’t eat, then when i politely decline she starts going over a list of stuff i can’t eat and how much it must suck. i’m a-okay without cheese. sure i miss it sometimes, but jfc my wellbeing is more important than cheese. i believed the opposite for a long time and it’s one of my biggest regrets.

i’m also googling how to make my own nicotine mints so i can stop spending $30 every time i run out. i have nicotine extract in my freezer. i can do this.

4:24p i am so tired

Unti555tled.mxd #82

8:16p i hate the term adulting at the end of the day, but it’s descriptive. my agent is putting our offer in for the condo we’ve been looking at. i was so anxious and nervous last night, like i was going on a second date with someone i was really interested in. just i was going on a date with a person i was really into.

just the person is a place to live and if everything goes right we’ll be going steady soon omg

10:22a i keep forgetting not to eat while listening to nosleep. peter lewis is amazing at narrating body horror. and by amazing, i mean i’m re-evaluating all my life choices up to this point. “pop go the people”, season 5 episode 3. i mean, at least i’m not eating some sort of gusher candy or something. just pistachios. but that’s still… there’s still a noise to eating pistachios, and it’s syncing up with points in the story that don’t need additional sound effects to be effective.

but i love this, it’s reminding me there’s a whole range of feeling outside of the constant anxiety.

10:31a i can do this
i can do this
i can do this
i can do this
i can do this
i can do this
i can do this
i can do this

12:06p i made my leasing agent cry. we’ve had a good friendship over the span of time we’ve lived at this complex.

also, day 2 of cloth pads has been uneventful. i washed yesterday’s in the shower. is that gross? it reads gross, but chronologically it made a lot of sense. when the fuck do i have time to handwash anything? i just hang it up when i’m done washing it.

1:48p lol every time i switch to my main mxd arcmap crashes

3:12p still haven’t heard back from my agent yet. but there’s still time in the day.

Unti555tled.mxd #81

8:16a i went to look at another condo last night. it was pretty and had new appliances and all this, but there was some damage. broken window. looked like the wall was pulling apart. the parking lot was pretty torn up.

another person showed up to meet their realtor there, and mine started talking offers really quick. i told her i had to talk to my boyfriend and sleep on it. i talked to my friend that had lived there before and she said it was a good area, but the building she was in had foundation problems and the property manager is terrible. i found a yelp review that said the same thing.

we’re going back to the condo that we looked at on sunday for another look. we really liked that spot.

9:33a fucking “chuck tingle’s pounded in the butt by my own podcast” is something else for sure. i fucking love how whomever’s narrating isn’t edited. this episode about the plane? the woman narrating had to start over like 3 or 4 times on a line because she couldn’t stop laughing.

goddamn, idk who this chuck tingle dude is but he’s so goddamn wholesome. love /is/ real.

11:14a my anxiety is high. so very high. i’m terrified re: buying a property. it’s just a LOT of fucking money and a veritable avalanche of adult responsibilities that i should be prepared for but i’m not. is this normal? am i the only one that stresses out about first time home buying? all these fuckers i see are just cool as cucumbers.

all i have is like, sheer terror. like i want it. i’m decorating the space in my head. i’m thinking about what color i’m going to paint the dining area, since it’s got a bunch of nail holes in the walls that i’ll have to fill. i’m trying to reconcile the differences between the two condos i saw in that complex. one has a siiiiiick dining room area that i’m 1000000% in love with and the other has a brand new AC and water heater. those are the only fucking differences between the two. the new AC & water heater unit also has a super grandma light fixture that i’m also 100% in love with. if i could just smash the two condos together i would.

11:46a day 1 of cloth pads instead of a menstrual cup is going well.

1:32p idk why i was thinking about it, i got really curious about the killing fields. we moved down here in 1994, and i’m 99.9999999% my parents had no idea there was a serial killer running around the area. i’m listening to the generation why episode on it. it’s weird to hear someone from wisconsin discuss my home like this. i wasn’t really allowed to roam the neighborhood, i could walk to my friend’s house 2 streets down or the pool. that was really it.

fwiw, i am hoping the killing fields killer is dead. if he was an adult when he started killing, i’d think he’d be in his 70s now.

1:39p why the fuck are they focusing on galveston?

“a little more on the wild side” lmao

2:34p holy shit, i just saw a release from my texas hometown’s police department that the police killed a man who threatened them with a samurai sword during a drug bust

4:27p mbmbmam #68 having fun with bleeps. this is comedy gold.

4:38p i’m terrified of this showing i’m going to. my agent is really nice and supportive and fucking amazing at her job, my boyfriend believes in me, i am like 99.99999999% sure i can afford it, i’m just sososososososo goddamned scared